Pretty Puerto Morelos: Paradise, Pyramids, and Persistent Smells

I feel that mixture of anger and frustration combined with sadness and loss as I begin this story. Years ago, I began writing this travelogue, then somehow left it in a draft and forgot about it. A few weeks back, I miraculously rediscovered it. I finished it off, published it, only to get locked out when the original website went down. Thanks again to that certain web developer who ghosted us faster than a Tinder date who sees your actual personality. Please forgive me if you read about this journey a few weeks ago, but let’s be honest, I’ll never remember what I wrote back then so this could be all new material for you! Or not. Who knows at this point.

So here we go…again.

Back to the Riviera Maya

September of 2018 would have us returning to Mexico. We had thoroughly enjoyed our week in Tulum, and so, were looking forward to another week in a different stretch of the Riviera Maya. Our destination this time was the Hotel Ventus at Marina El Cid Spa & Beach Resort, located by the lovely little fishing village of Puerto Morelos, Mexico.

Landing in Cancun, the resort was less than an hour away, so I barely had time to enjoy my second beer on the bus before I was hauling luggage to the front desk. The Ventus makes a great impression. It’s a beautiful 5 storey luxury hotel with 3 pools and 2 jacuzzi areas for adults. Staff was plentiful at check in and very attentive. We were even provided with coupons for jewelry and coupons for substantial discounts on premium amenities. It was looking like it was going to be a great week!

Spoiler alert: those coupons were bait. But we’ll get to that.

When Something Smells Fishy in Paradise

Ahhh…optimism can be fleeting sometimes. As we were being escorted to our deluxe room the smell hit us. We were perplexed. Is that sewage? Is it dead fish? Is it a gas leak? It smelled like some weird combination of all 3, with perhaps a hint of regret thrown in for good measure. It was only a few minutes and we were in our air-conditioned room and all traces of the noxious aroma were gone.

Taking our time in the room, we unpacked, showered, changed clothes. Then we read through the tourist material and discussed possible excursions. By the time we finished, dinner hour had arrived.

As soon as we left the building to head to the restaurant, we were assailed again by that horrible smell. Thankfully, with the breeze coming in off the Caribbean, it came and went, but when it came it was disgusting. Hopefully the maintenance crew could get that leaky pipe fixed quickly! Narrator voice: It was not a leaky pipe.

Dinner was amazing. Just looking around the hotel itself set an expectation for the quality of the food, and it didn’t disappoint. Every single meal at the resort was a true gastronomical delight. After dinner drinks at one of the bars followed. Chatting with some of the staff and fellow travelers was fun, but since the first day of travel tends to be long and tiring, we headed for bed relatively early.

The Dreaded Timeshare Trap

The next morning during breakfast, a well-dressed gentleman approached us. He wanted to remind us of our “meeting” starting in a half hour.

We hadn’t signed on for any meeting. When we told him he must have us confused with someone else, he insisted that no, all new guests attend the meeting. It would only take 20-30 minutes, he promised. Not knowing any better, we agreed and followed him out to the gathering area.

It was only a few minutes later that we discovered it was a time-share pitch.

No. No, no, no, no, NO! We had gone through a nightmare scenario upon our last trip to Mexico. This time we thought we dodged the bullet at the airport where they fooled us into attending one of these meetings last time. There was no way I was going through that again.

Thanks but we’re not interested and we’ll be leaving now. 45 minutes and 3 escalations later, I finally just grabbed my better half’s hand and walked out in the middle of the latest pitch.

I had forgot to include that portion of the tale in the re-write of “To Tulum and Back“, and I won’t rehash it here. Let’s just say if you’re traveling to Mexico and someone offers you any kind of perk (coupons, free excursions, gifts, even cash) just say no. Unless you enjoy sitting in closed off rooms for a minimum of 4 hours while salespeople ignore your “no” and pass you off to 5 or 6 different people who insist they’re NOT selling time-shares, I strongly urge you to be VERY firm in declining all such offers. Nothing will ruin one full day of your vacation quite like a time-share pitch.

Sargassum: The Smelly Truth Revealed

One thing we did learn that morning after escaping was the source of the continued smell. Sargassum. This floating micro-algae moves across the Atlantic into the Caribbean. When it washes up and starts decomposing, it creates hydrogen sulphide gas. Boy does it ever. As it turns out, 2018 brought what they called a Sargassum inundation to the Caribbean. I can verify that. The scientific community can call it an “inundation” if they want. I’m going with “biblical plague.”

Despite the efforts of municipalities and resorts along the coast, they couldn’t haul it away or bury it fast enough. Watching resort staff try to keep up with decomposing seaweed was like watching someone bail out the Titanic with a teaspoon. Admirable effort, questionable results. The best they could accomplish were small sargassum-free swimming areas of the beach. Looks like we’d be enjoying the pools during our stay.

Conquering (Half) a Pyramid at Coba

The last time we stayed in Mexico, we explored the ruins of Tulum and purchased an excursion to Chichen Itza. Both sites were highlights for me. As the ancient history enthusiast in the family, I felt a bit emotional reaching out to physically touch historical places that had intrigued me over the years. Chichen Itza in particular was pretty spellbinding for me. But in 2018, authorities had made climbing the main pyramid illegal.

For this reason, I talked Tina into yet another ancient history site at Coba, where climbing the pyramid was still legal. A couple of hours on a bus and we were soon walking the grounds at Coba. While not as grand or imposing as Chichen Itza, Coba gave you more of the sense that you just stumbled through the jungle and found this deteriorating relic poking out of the underbrush. You could imagine yourself as the archeologist making the first exploratory investigation of the site.

The Climb That Wasn’t

My travel companion wasted no time in her ascent. Stopping only a couple of times to catch her breath and take some photos, she soon reached the top and started doing Facebook Live from the summit. I on the other hand, encountered a handicap. I made it halfway up before my acrophobia took charge.

Normally, I can overcome this condition if there’s some form of safety device in place. The Coba pyramid does have a hefty hemp rope running down the steps from top to bottom. However, when lots of other people make the same ascent using the same rope, that safety device goes out the window for me. The acrophobia takes over. So there I sat, halfway up an ancient Mayan pyramid. My wife conquered the summit while I clung to ancient limestone like a particularly pathetic tree sloth. Oh well. I still enjoyed climbing the pyramid and taking in the view from the halfway point, plus Tina’s photos and perspective. And my dignity. Wait, no, I left that about 40 steps down.

The excursion included a stop at a local cenote for lunch and a swim. If you don’t already know, a cenote is basically a sinkhole caused by limestone bedrock erosion. The water makes for a nice cool and refreshing dip in the middle of a hot Mexican jungle. After my half-hearted pyramid performance, plunging into that crystal-clear water felt like redemption. Or at least like really good air conditioning.

History lovers like me should put any or all of the Mayan sites in Mexico on their list. Just maybe practice your rope-climbing skills first. Or bring someone who won’t judge you from the summit.

Exploring the Village Charm

Back at the resort, we saved time for drinks in the pool, sunning in the deck chairs, before heading to the showers and preparing for dinner. Afterwards, the remainder of our routine followed. Entertainment and drinks, making friends with strangers, and debriefing before bed.

The next day we took a stroll off-resort into the village of Puerto Morelos, Mexico. I’m glad the municipality put up “Beware of Crocodiles” signs along the sidewalk to the village. Nothing says “relaxing vacation walk” quite like constant awareness that you could become a reptile’s lunch at any moment. Having a croc come up out of the mangroves right beside me would have been the last thing on my mind. Actually, it would have been the last thing on my mind period.

Puerto Morelos is as postcard as you can get. Quaint and charming, clean and picturesque, with photo opportunities everywhere. Of course, there are lots of tourist-based shops, but even more importantly, there are lots of local eateries sprinkled throughout the town. You can’t help but want to stop at all of them and have a beer and a bite to eat. So we did. Not all of them. Actually, only one, but it did not disappoint. My liver has limits, even on vacation.

If you find yourself wandering the streets of Puerto Morelos, make sure to stop at El Merkadito Bar & Grill on the main square. Fresh fish tacos paired with an ice-cold Pacifico Clara on a scorching afternoon? That’s the kind of simple perfection that makes you wonder why you ever eat anywhere else.

The All-Inclusive Reset Button

The remainder of our stay progressed much the same as most of our all-inclusive destinations. Rest, drink, eat, explore, repeat. Pool time, entertainment in the evenings, and meeting and chatting with new people and staff. We use all-inclusives as battery chargers. There’s not a lot of thought required, no worrying about what or where you’re going to eat or how you’re going to entertain yourselves. It really is about R&R.

Although the sargassum gas never really improved, we either grew a bit accustomed to it, or simply ignored it completely. The human capacity for adaptation is truly remarkable. Give us a week and we can get used to almost anything, including breathing what essentially amounts to nature’s fart.

Sometime before our departure, they did come calling to reclaim the coupon and the “free gift” given to us on day 1. A small price to pay for escaping the dreaded “NOT a time-share” presentation. I handed them back with a smile. Take them. They were worth every minute of that 45-minute argument.

Regardless of the pain points of this particular getaway, we loved the resort, we still love Mexico, and we absolutely love Puerto Morelos, Mexico. We would definitely go back, and we did! More than once! You’ll hear about those journeys soon.

If you’re looking for honest travel advice and want to plan your own Puerto Morelos escape without the timeshare pitch, reach out to us at Boarding Pass Travel. We’ve been there, done that, survived the hydrogen sulphide, and we’ll make sure your vacation is all paradise and no surprises.

Stay tuned, because when a place is this good (timeshare traps, decomposing seaweed, and crocodile warnings notwithstanding), once is never enough.